And On That Note...

That's my catchphrase just to let you know. From this day forward if I see ANYONE and I mean ANYONE using that, I'll be calling my lawyer. But seriously that's my signature quote. I've been absent from my blog game (as usual) so here's what's been going down in The Life and Times of M. Loftin. Call me a hypocrite, call me a dumbass or call me an idiot but I've once again got back with Broudicca Fields. Strong feelings keep me attached, I've got just too much love for her to lose her over stupid ish. With this happening, I've scrapped Operation: Lifesaver and now I'm currently devising a new plan known as Operation: Revival. I'll give you more details once I get it right...lol. I've filled out an application to Publix today, but the highlight at this current time would have to be about my Mirco$oft Zune. Now if you get on FACEBOOK and have me as a friend then you already know about my situation. Well how about the only problem was my battery was completely dead, but thanks to an OVERNIGHT charge it's working again! Now this a HUGE fail on my behalf because I thought I could be slick and purchase a new Zune, swap it with my old dead ZUNE and return and get my moolah back. So I'm fixing to return this Zune and get my $140+ back. In other news, my fanfiction engines are starting to roar once more. I'm off this TUESDAY AND WEDNESDAY so hopefully I'll be able to drop something BRAND NEW on fanfiction.net. No promises though...until next time.

~TM-1

PLEASE DO NOT TELL ME HOW TO DO MY JOB

Is it me or do these days a customer/guest seems to think they know more than you? Yesterday was a prime example because I wasted two hours not only of my shift, but my whole life with this fossil woman. I will try to explain this the best I can. She wanted to buy a pre-paid phone from Virgin Mobile. Now on their brochures they advertise the 'TOTALLY UNLIMTED' for $49.99 a month. Now for some odd reason she thought that all she had to do was buy the phone and it would have the UNLIMTED minutes on it. Wrong! Everyone knows that the phone and plan have to be purchased seperately. So after me explaining, a co-worker, a manager, a customer service representative from VIRGIN MOBILE and my store manager, the lady just wouldn't listen. She insisted she was correct, so finally she decided to take her business elsewhere. Too bad she's gonna be proven wrong no matter where she goes. I can't wait til WAL-MART tells her the same exact thing. I can seriously see her going to VIRGIN MOBILE HQ and telling their president that all she needs to do is pay for the phone and that's it. It's still a shame two hours of productivity was wasted on ignorance.

~TM-1

Operation: Lifesaver

This plan has been in effect ever since 5/13/09 and so far it is working in my favor. Lemme break it down to you. Operation: Lifesaver is a three-step process I'm going through to not only improve my SUMMER but to also improve my life.

Phase I: Relationship

Now if you know me, you know I've been dating a certain girl for the last 20 months. Eversince the first couple of weeks in our relationship we got into little arguments over nothing. This built up for months and months to come and after struggling to keep my cool this whole time, I finally decided that it wasn't meant to be. I love her to death but we just don't see eye to eye. We are on two completely different levels. Last thing I needed to be going through this summer was girl problems. I'll always love you, Broudicca Fields. But we've seriously gotta treat life like U-HAUL and keep it movin'!

Phase II: Job

As you've seen in my previous blog, I've just had enough of TARGET. I swear that having a job at TARGET was almost like my last relationship at times. I mean once upon a time ago I use to LOVE working there, now all I do is argue with the management, get screwed constantly. So in order to have happiness restore to my jollyless body, I need a new job. Plain and simple. I'm still aiming for retail so as of right now I've got crosshairs locked on: Sams Club, Home Depot, Lowe's and Best Buy. THE JOB HUNTING PROCESS CONTINUES!

Phase III: N2U

This final phase can only be made possible once I leave TARGET. Trying to work on this phase earlier can result into some serious drama. But only a couple of close friends might know what this phase is all about. I'm gonna keep it hush mode for now and expose it depending on how it goes. As of right now it's 50/50 this'll work...

I'm really excited about Operation: Lifesaver and seriously hope I've played my cards right, like Gambit.

~TM-1

TM-1 Vents Part III

After working nearly at TARGET for three years, it finally feels like it's time to go. This is something that has been building up for months and the last straw was placed onto the camel's back on 5/13. From 2008 til this very date today, I've learned so much new tricks, I've improved so much in general. I mean isn't that what is suppose to happen when you do something over and over again? You're suppose to get better as time progresses? That's exactly what I've done, but not in the eyes of my management. After all the favors, all the unnecessary tasks, all the leading I've done for team members, all the guests I've helped with OUTSTANDING guest service and yet I'm currently ranked as IE. IE stands for Inconsistent effective, which means that I most of the time do my job, but sometimes I don't meet the requirements of my said title. That's hurts, man. It hurts that they don't recognize the greatness that is I. Last year I was actually ranked a E which stands of EFFECTIVE. Now I've been demoted to this? I've done at least 1000X more work this year than last. Now they've set the rocket off, as we speak right now I'm filling out some online applications to other retail stores in the area. Stores I know that will pay WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY more than that hellhole I current work in. Wish me luck, WORLD!

~TM-1

*yawns*

Playing til 1:30am last night might have not been such a good idea. Especially for one who expected to get as many of the 33 salesplanners due by tomorrow as possible. A salesplanner is an endcap (which is located either on the front or back of a aisle) My goal is 10, but I can't make no promises...wish me luck, world.

~TM-1

smh @ oprah.com/kfc

Big O, you have failed me...thanks to your wacky URL I was told at my local KFC that my coupon was invalid. The last four digits of my coupon (1234) did not match the one they had at KFC (3174) So instead of enjoying KFC, I had to betray them and head down to Chick-Fil-A and spend nearly six bucks. Now the worst part is my mom just went to KFC a while ago and now they accept the damn coupon. WTF?! She said that everyone in line with her had that same exact code, so now I guess since somebody done messed up now they'll take it. So now I have to enjoy my meal tomorrow...

~TM-1

Gears of War 2 Terminology Manual Part I

Alright, here's a more serious blog post. Every night I go on XBL with my friends and we play a little game called GEARS OF WAR 2. However, it's very special to us because we have adapted our own terms for many of the events that occur in the game. I know there are tons of slang we've made up for this game but this post will feature the first fifteen that came to mind. I hope you are not eating or drinking anything because if so, it will fly out of your mouth and possibly damage your desktop or laptop computer. Enjoy!

1. Oh baby! My fuckin' lips is WET!- When you spot a weak opponent and prepare to engage in battle.
2. Harvey Dent'D - When one proceeds to approach his enemy with a shotgun from behind and blows him into two pieces.
   
3. ID4'D (Independence Day'D) - When you are obliterated by the Hammer Of Dawn.
4. Look up at the stars- When you are down, but not out...yet.
5. Spread dem cheeks!- While your enemy is crawling away for revival, you follow and blast them in the rear section.
6. Jazzy Jeff'D- When you are killed in a animation style similar to Uncle Phil throwing Jazz out of his house.
7. Barney Rubble'D- When you melee your opponent to death. Similar to a cavemen striking his wife with a club.
8. CW approved trap- When you booby-trap a certain area on the stage and successfully kill your foe. Founded by Charles Wilder, 2008.
   
9. I got dat BOOM BOOM BOOM!- When you successfully acquire the Boomshot.
10. I wanna see [insert number] buttcheeks in front of me, going to the BOOM!- When your whole team races towards the Boomshot. This is usually performed at River.
11. Just ran through that like John Cena in The Marine!- When you successfully escape deadly situations.
12. Circle Jerk- Once you've downed the final foe, you and your comrades trap him in a circle and proceed to rape him til further notice. (varies between how many of your teammates are left alive)
13. LEROOOOOOOOOY JENKINS! - When you roadie run right into the battle without any second thought.
    
14. Hamburgerburst- Alternate name for the Hammerburst.
15. Hammer of John- Alternate name for the Hammer of Dawn.

Part II will be coming soon...

~TM-1

If I'm Not The Great Team Hero For This Month...

Then I'm gay, lol (inside joke) But dead ass, for the last month I've definitely worked outside of my job description and I feel that I'm the GREATEST TEAM MEMBER ALIVE! Plus all the ETLs excluding the actual store manager have been telling me I've been doing an outstanding job. So, we'll see if my face appears on that wall for May. If not, I'm comin' to work with the...just joking, seriously.

~TM-1

P.S.- This was just a post to let you guys know I'm still ALIVE!